Maybe my letter-writing campaign finally paid off

posted by RICK : 7:50 PM

New York Post (via TVGuide.com)

Hmm, maybe the fat lady should shut her mouth and take a seat. The New York Post hears brand-new buzz that Showtime has not only picked up Fox's canceled Arrested Development but has ordered a full 26 episodes.

Funny, I was just getting use to the idea that the show was going to be a thing of the past.

(thanks Paul for the heads up).

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The Drunk Dial Hotline

posted by RICK : 12:29 AM

As per my word, the site is up. At this point it isn't entirely functional, but it does have 4 (FOUR!) messages left for your amusement. But I can't stress this part enough: put 832.446.2675 in your cell phone and tell your friends... the site only works with the help of America's intoxicated youth.

Thanks.

www.gincork.com

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Wednesday night's all right for fighting.

posted by RICK : 10:30 PM

With February sweeps just about over (most of the networks held off their A-games this year so as to not confuse people really-really wanting to watch 14 consecutive hours of ice-skating) we are finally heading into the back stretch of the ’05-’06 television season. This hasn’t been a particularly good year for new programming (did anyone catch Emily’s Reasons Why Not?). Last year’s new shows, however, seem to be thriving (or the closest equivalent). Two of the best were Lost and Veronica Mars. Sharing the same time-slot, and quite possibly much of the same audience, the two series illustrate diametrically opposing forces of the same beast: the expertly crafted uber-mystery.

Lost went into season two as the obvious champ both in terms of audience size and cultural importance, spawning some of the most interesting water-cooler talk in what seemed to be ages. More important, it helped contribute to the current renaissance in narrative television (Desperate Housewives and Grey’s Anatomy also played a part—thanks ABC—but Lost was the weirdest, and for better or for worse, that made it the best—at least on broadcast). Lost proved that audiences not only want stories that build over time, but showed that they’ll stick around to see how things turn out. If this means that one fewer police procedural will make it to air in the future, then by-God they’ve done their job.

This season’s premiere episode started out with a literal bang in what should only be described as one of the single greatest reveals in the history of time-based-entertainment. Hyperbole aside, it was particularly kick-ass (for those of you who enjoy having your memory jogged, we started this season inside the mysterious hatch—unbeknownst to us at the time—following around some dude as he worked out and listened to an exceptionally catchy song by The Momma’s and The Papa’s only for the aforementioned ‘bang’ to cause this mystery man to grab a rifle and run though the complex’s hallways eventually resulting in our climb up the very tunnel we descended during the season finale three months earlier). Unfortunately, from that point forward the show took an ill-advised seven-episode u-turn in an attempt to answer questions we were never all that concerned about in the first place. Along the way we were introduced to the obligatory second-season “new characters,” like Ana-Lucia (Michelle Rodriguez), a woman so unlikable she couldn’t find a way to eke out a drop of sympathy from us even after we discover she was a former cop who was shot while pregnant (hopefully recent D.U.I. charges in Hawaii may cause Ms. Rodriguez to be written out of the show sooner than later. I’m hoping she’s written out by that giant polar bear).

The brightest spot of this season came from an episode that aired on February 8th, entitled “The Long Con,” in which Sawyer (Josh Holloway) steals a massive collection of guns on the island over the course of a—wait for it—long con. The episode, arguably the season’s best, worked because it wasn’t trying to shock you with a seemingly endless barrage of island-mythology, but instead by doing what the series did best in season one: using the framework of the island to tell complex character stories. That, and employing some old-school slight-of-hand where upon the big revelation you just can’t believe you didn’t figure it out sooner. “The Long Con” proved that Lost is still as sharp a piece of televised drama as one could ask for, and its stellar ratings suggest it isn’t going anywhere any time soon.

This, of course, leads right to Veronica Mars—the most recent entry into the peculiar genre of television programming also home to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Gilmore Girls, Smallville, Firefly, and Alias among others. Let’s call the genre “Whebrams,” as all of those shows either could have or did come from J.J. Abrams or Joss Whedon. They’re high-concept series, frequently with snarky leads, strong female characters and a good-dose of old-fashioned melodrama added in for taste. And aside from Alias (and Lost) they all air (or aired) on the one of the bottom three networks (Fox, UPN, WB), which in most cases has resulted in the creation of a popular (if select) niche. The drawback being that said niche overlaps almost perfectly from series to series but especially between Veronica Mars and Lost, likely resulting in certain shows drawing fewer viewers than they perhaps otherwise would. Not all of Lost’s audience will want to tune in for Veronica Mars, but I can only imagine that most of Veronica Mars’ audience will want to tune in for Lost, which is maddening for a fan of both shows (of course BitTorrent and the ever-present DVR make almost all of these worries a thing of the past, but seeing as how the ratings model fails to adjust to any of this makes the conflict remain).

Luckily Veronica Mars isn’t on the chopping block just yet, and next year’s merger of UPN and the WB into the ridiculously named “The CW” may end up addressing this issue. The catch is until Veronica Mars is moved to a different time slot it will be forever know as “The show I’m watching instead of Lost,” and can’t be judged on its own merits—merits that are quite good.

This season also got started with a bang and by ‘bang’ I mean ‘school bus full of kids getting driven off a cliff.’ The bus crash has been the driving force (PUN INTENDED) behind the action of this season, much as the Lilly Cane murder propelled the episodes of season-one. The writing is as tight as always. Part of what makes Veronica Mars so appealing is that it couldn’t be more unrealistic—just like Lost—and yet highly believable. Not only is Neptune High unlike your high school, it’s unlike anyone’s high school. Based on the thirty-seven episodes that have aired thus far, Neptune, California, has painted itself as Raymond Chandler’s wet-dream: people constantly missing, murders galore, and endless motives, and at the center of all of it is Veronica Mars herself (Kristin Bell) acting as Philip Marlow.

Like Lost, Veronica Mars’ peak this season came recently. In an episode entitled, “Donut Run” creator and non-Matchbox-20-lead-singer Rob Thomas wrote one of the most ingenious scripts of this or any season. The episode not only broke with the show’s tradition of having Veronica narrate each episode (a turn that only became evident in the episodes closing moments), but was packed with enough twists to make even Sawyer find his ‘Long Con’ to be mere child’s play. “Donut Run” was an episode so remarkable, all other television in 2006 should be rated against it-- yes, even the new Sopranos season. And it wasn’t just in the intricate plotting, Mr. Thomas included a myriad moments of inspiration. In one scene after Veronica is dumped by her boyfriend she goes to her room and puts on “How Can You Mend A Broken Heart” by Al Green to sulk. But the song doesn’t come from an Al Green record, instead from The Virgin Suicides Soundtrack, obviously a gentle nod to the moment itself, but also points to the undeniable fact that high school girls LOVE soundtracks. These subtle realities placed within the context of a show that makes no bones about how utterly ridiculous it actually is, creates a kind of peanut-butter-and-chocolate relationship on the screen—tasty.

Aesthetically, both Lost and Veronica Mars are joys to looks at. Of course, being shot in Hawaii doesn’t hurt for Lost. There are no shortages of luscious greens to fill the frame and, well, for a bunch of people who have been stranded on an island for two months, they couldn’t be any easier on the eyes. Veronica Mars is able to push the visual boundary another way altogether though its refreshing use of wide-angle lenses. And not in a “Oh no, I’m so drunk, everything’s all wide-angle and I’m getting dizzy” sort of way, instead Veronica Mars looks much closer to Coen Brothers—like Raising Arizona—with its ability to place interesting characters within just-crazy-enough sets and then let the natural distortion of a short lens do the rest of the work. Barry Sonenfeld, the Coen’s one-time D.P. said it best in an interview on the Miller’s Crossing DVD, “Long lenses are serious, and short lenses are funny.” Wonderfully put.

Perhaps that’s really what this time-slot battle comes down to: the difference between a “long-lens-show” and a “short-lens-show.” Lost is serious television, no matter how maddening it may become, and audiences respond to that more than to a show that’s funny, or quirky, or god-forbid, funny and quirky. That’s probably the reason why there are rarely any comedies in the Neilson top-ten. Americans, the busy bunch that they are, figure if they’re going to give an hour of their life over to something every Wednesday at nine, it might as well be something grand, which is exactly why Veronica Mars can never live up to its ABC-fueled cousin despite it being, at least this season, much better.

Lost (season 2) * * * of 4
Veronica Mars (season 2) * * * 1/2 of 4

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Pansy

posted by RICK : 10:31 AM

So, the end of last night's The Shield made me start to well up a little bit.

ALSO: Go ahead and file this one under "shady government deals."

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Sunday Morning Post

posted by RICK : 9:22 AM

Maintenance:
You may have noticed that the "Sweet Posts" column has been deleted, though it's more likely that you have not. Either way, it has. This is because I don't think I'm in a position to really determine what a "Sweet Post" is-- despite the fact that, you know, I'm the blog administrator and can really do whateverthefuck I'd like. And even if I did feel okay identifying a sweet post, I don't think I'd want to. That's right, I'm a real live wire (haha, no).

In place of the aforementioned "Sweet Posts" I've decided to fill the space with some non-blog-links that are at the very least tangentially related to this site (hopefully the list will expand). One of those items I'd now like to take the time to introduce.

The Drunk-Dial Hotline:
1.832.gin.cork
(1.832.446.2675)

Call this number!

Better yet, put this number in your cell phone and then call it when you're out with friends. It leads to a voice-mail. Leave a message. Or two. Or twenty. I don't care. But do call it. And pay it forward-- the more the merrier.

This idea: within the next week I hope to post a new site whose exclusive purpose is to house these messages for mass enjoyment. Don't worry, names and other such incriminating evidence will be edited out. It'll just be a phone line and the will of the people. Have at it (I have!).

Good/Bad movies
Good: Finally saw "Heathers" last night. Deliciously dark.
Bad: I'm about an hour into "Girl 6" (one of, say, 4 Spike Lee movies I haven't seen) and DAMN if it isn't awful. It has kind of a "She Hate Me" vibe, but at least that movie, though bad, had some ideas in it. This is just... bad.

Jury Duty
I might not go. Seriously. It's on Tuesday. Perhaps I shouldn't have blogged that? Oh well, its a shame there isn't a way to erase any of this.

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The Crimson Album

posted by JDM : 1:21 PM

I met some weird kids in my college dorm, but few were as eccentric as Rivers Cuomo is.

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Mother Paris = joke or no?

posted by Anonymous : 7:12 PM

Today IMDb reports:

Socialite Paris Hilton has reportedly been asked to play celebrated humanitarian Mother Teresa in a movie biopic. Indian director T. Rajeevnath has contacted the hotel heiress about taking the lead role in his new film, which will chronicle the late nun's life. He tells MTV.co.uk, "My agents in California have contacted Paris Hilton. Although there are several actresses willing to play the role of Mother Teresa, the most widely respected and loved person, the history of the actress who is finally chosen for the role would have to be analyzed thoroughly before she is chosen."
Um...

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Ask Questions Later

posted by RICK : 2:25 PM

Did you catch last night's "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart?" It made me laugh. Sure, its target on this particular episode couldnt' have been more obvious, but sometimes, SOMETIMES, it's the obvious joke you want to hear the most.

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Never take your eyes off a Nor'Easter.

posted by RICK : 2:57 PM

They're shifty. Like claims-adjusters.

Last night around 8pm one decided to pass through the 5 boroughs. There is now about 18 inches of snow on the ground. Charles De Mar would love this. I, however, have to make the decision that so many of us make in these times of turmoil: do I stay here at work (even though I'm off) and wait for things to "get better" or do I put on my boots and work my way from the west-side to the east. Two miles. Two miles of crystallized water. Awesome.

Unrelated: Marc Summers just did a segment on "Unwrapped" about a company that makes chocolate body-paint? Something tells me it wasn't his idea.

Tangential: Kettle Chips has this flavor called "Spicy Thai." It lives up to its name is SPADES.

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Happy Birthday Mr. MS

posted by RICK : 1:42 PM

Yay.

I always thought this one was a real gem.

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In Case You Missed It...

posted by RICK : 1:05 PM

Prince on SNL playing "Fury"

This might be the greatest musical performance on SNL since Nirvana played "Rape Me" back in 199(4?). It's the type of performance that makes you put down the magazine you're reading. And dammit if that guy can't shread!

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Tristram Shandy

posted by RICK : 2:11 AM

Editor's Note: I posted this early Saturday morning. It then disappeared. But yet, somehow, is available via kinja. I don't really understand. In any case, I'm reposting... so appologies if you've seen this one.

As previously mentioned, my idea of doing background research before seeing the film "Tristram Shandy: A Cock and Bull Story" was to watch the first season of "I'm Alan Partridge," Steve Coogan's popular BBC series from the late 90s, and not, say, actually read the book, "The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman." Perhaps this is the perfect illustration of my media-priorities: be sure you get the joke even if its at the cost of context. This isn't anything new. An American who hasn't "read the book" is kind of like a German who hasn't "persecuted the jews." If I really wanted to shock the world I'd say that not only did I read the aforementioned novel, but wrote an academic paper. Yeah, that would have shown you all!

But enough about my lack of literary context, let's talk about Steve Coogan, yeah? Yeah. First, my hunch about "I'm Alan Partridge" proved to be correct as "Tristram Shandy" did have a few Partridge referrences (not limited to Coogan's co-star doing an impression of him as Partridge). Laugh track aside, the series is pretty brilliant. It's safe to say that there wouldn't be "The Office" without it. David Brent and Alan Partridge are basically different takes on the same personality. Both crave fame but one already had it (and lost it). The biggest difference is that Brent wanted everyone to be his friend (of at least let them think that he wanted everyone to be his friend-- every cloud, yeah?) whereas Partridge is really only looking out for #1 (he tells his staff that they got picked up for a second series only to fire all of them 3 minutes later).

What is perhaps more interesting is that Coogan's approach to the character is much more of a cartoon, whereas Gervais' Brent is firmly rooted in reality. This made "The Office" the better series, but over the long haul it will likely prove Coogan to be the better actor. It comes down to three roles, really: 1) Alan Partridge, 2) Tony Wilson in "24 Hour Party People" and 3) Steve Coogan in "Coffee and Cigarettes" and "Tristram Shandy." The roles aren't entirely dissimilar, but the variance in Coogan's performance is uncanny-- he's played himself twice, each with its own nuances.

I can barely play myself in real life.

And yes, he did make the Jackie Chan adventure "Around the World in 80 Days," but DeNiro did "Showtime" (and in that he never had to act in a hot-air balloon).

Draw your own conclusions.

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Re: Funny Ha Ha

posted by RICK : 5:32 PM

After posting about this movie a couple weeks back several people have told me they saw it (which is delightful), and they have all HATED it.

I feel like I may have misrepresented the film. Allow me to take this time to correct that.

"Funny Ha Ha" is a movie that I found absolutely incredible. That being said, this isn't a movie for everyone-- one of the reasons I find it so damn cool. In this day and age every movie is suppose to appeal to the broadest possible audience it can, "Funny Ha Ha" is a small film that has a laser-sighted-focus on its audience: me, people like me. This is significant because I feel like the Hollywood model is slowly eroding and eventually they (like what the cable networks have already done) are going to have to realize that people no longer want something built for the masses, they want something built specifically for them. Ironically, the "hyper-liberal" film industry is really one of the most conservative organizations in all media. Nothing changes. Ever. It has been operating exactly the same since the birth of film 100 years ago. Like the music industry before it, they simply do not want to acknowledge the fact that people tastes are changing.

But this is neither here nor there, I'm suppose to be defending "Funny Ha Ha," which is actually kind of odd since my thesis is that "Funny Ha Ha" doesn't actually need defending, because its overall impact on culture is so small. Perhaps the more important point to be made is that what makes "Funny Ha Ha" good (whether it is a movie you liked or not) is its honesty toward its subject matter-- something people inherently respond to (even if those people are only me).

And now for something completely similar:
Chuck Klosterman is Blogging at the SuperBowl for ESPN. It's great. So great, in fact, that I'm willing to let him off the hook for the past couple months worth of boring Esquire columns.

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State of the Union-Secrets Revealed!

posted by m.moore : 2:50 AM

After watching Bush address the nation (or what Robert E. Lee refers to as the 'Union') one thing he said stuck out more than any other. It wasn't his policies on terror, his plans to cope with social security/baby boomers, or even his stead fast stance on Iraq...

Animal-Human hybrids?!

While he was discussing the role of human ethics in the case of stem-cell research, he then described his lack of support for "Animal-Human hybrids" claiming such scientific pursuits were not ethical.

Ethics-Schmethics! We're building Superhumans?! I've never been more excited in all my life! Essentially, somewhere in the world someone is building X-men. Mr. Bush, the cat is officially out of the bag and I'm sure your lack of Human-Animal Hybrid research will result in your Dungeons and Dragons approval rating to fall right through the floor.
(Despite my excitement for these supposed developements,Bush could have very well confused the 'film' The Island of Dr. Moreau for a special addition of Anderson Cooper 360. Hell, sometimes I mistake Wal Kilmer for Anderson Cooper-an honest mistake)

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