The Adventures of A, B, and C on Avenue B

posted by RICK : 3:18 AM

A walks down the street, listening to his iPod. "Tape N Tapes" is the featured selection. B stops him.

B: Yo, do you have a light for my cigarette?
A: Sorry I don't.
B: Hey, iPod. Do you have a light for my cigarette?
A: I don't have a light.

A tries to walk, but B blocks him.

B: Make me some fire nigga.
A: If you get me two sticks I can rub them together and light your cigarette.
B: Then get some sticks. Make me fire.
A: I don't see any sticks. Find me some sticks and I'll make your fire.
B: Make me some sticks, iPod.

B keeps A from walking away. C is off to the side. He laughs, but doesn't seem to want any of this.

A and B start walking.

A: Find me those sticks and I'll rub them together and make you fire.
B: Here's a stick, nigga.

B hands A a stick.

A: Great, now I just need one more, and I can make you your fire.
B: There's your stick.

B points to a tree. A starts rubbing the stick on the tree.

A: Great, now put your cigarette against this and I'll make you your fire.
B: Give me your iPod.
A: Just put your cigarette against the tree and I'll start the fire.

B grabs A's white earbuds and pulls the cord from his pocket.

B: Give me your iPod, nigga.
A: You have it. It's attached to the headphones.

B looks at the end of the cable and sees no iPod. A doesn't see it either. B reaches into the pocket of A and pulls out a wallet. The wallet has about thirty dollars in it, a credit card, a bank card, a social-security card, an AMC movie-watcher card, a work ID, and various papers and notes.

C: I didn't do any of this.
A: Hey, you didn't get my iPod. I still have it.

B is running down the block with C.

A: Hey! You didn't get my iPod! I'll trade you the iPod for the wallet!

B stops running.

B: Where's the iPod?

A pulls it out of his pocket and holds it up. B comes back to A.

B: Give me the iPod.
A: Give me the wallet.

The two each hold the item the other wants, dance around each other for a minute and eventually make the switch.

B gets the iPod. The iPod is a Shuffle. It was purchased for $58 at Circuit City in an "open box." It currently housed the Tapes N Tapes record, the new Ben Kweller record. An early Belle and Sebastian record, and a release by The Drive-By Truckers.

A gets the wallet. It's missing about $30, but still has $7 in it, as well as the credit card, the bank card, and the various pieces of identificaiton.

B and C run down the block and turn at the corner of the park.

A walks home.

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Mmmmmm, that's some good eatin'

posted by RICK : 10:26 AM

Here is a video a friend of mine put together. It's quite funny, and he even snuck in a line that I had told him. Spread the good word.

0 Comments

Some highlights from my trip to Chicago last week

posted by RICK : 1:11 AM

0 Comments

The Hardest Simpson to Button

posted by JDM : 2:54 AM

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Karma Police, Arrest This Girl.

posted by erin : 12:36 PM

Things I did this weekend:


Had my bank account wiped out on the 8th and 9th.
Turned 24 on the 10th.
Filed a police report for grand larceny on the 11th.

Gooood times.

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Can't spell "Agassi" without "A Gas!"

posted by RICK : 1:12 AM

Monday night I went to the US Open and saw Andre Agassi beat Andre Pavel in a grueling three and a half hour opening round match. It was fun times ten. Well, he won again tonight. It was epic times fourteen!

Basically what I'm saying is tennis is awesome.

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