Those F#@ckers better see in 5-D!

posted by RICK : 2:06 PM

After almost two years of full-time employment, I'm finally taking advantage of my companies health benefits. Yesterday I made an appointment to get my teeth cleaned, and today I went to the eye-doctor to get a new set of glasses.

I was expecting to go in, get my exam, pick out some cool frames, and leave having spent somewhere between 0-100 dollars (American). Then things started to add up. AND ADD UP THEY DID! The problem began with the people behind the counter telling me about all the cool features that my current glasses have (glasses paid for by my parents, with their insurance-- PUBLIC SCHOOL INSURANCE). See, I couldn't very well take a step backwards, could I? What if my eyes burst into flames? That would suck and would be painful, no? I also learned that my current glasses have some sort of "thinning agent" placed on the lenses to keep them light and fluffy. Without that I may be in coke-bottle territory. The fact of the matter is I have no idea how bad my eyes are because I've been fortunate enough to really great glasses in previous years.

So here's the rub: they total the bill, with all the coatings and the un-price-tagged frames I picked out and my coverage deductions and I walked out of there having dropped a sum of money that would have easily bought a new iPod-- the good one.

Thanks insurance. Thanks for screwin' me (sadly, I have no one to blame but myself).

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